For reasons not important to this blog, I got out all my kinky toys and laid them quickly across the bed.

I have a set of pink floggers: These things are beautiful, custom-made treasures. They are soft pink, soft leather, soft handles. They smell like earth and wood. My friend Magickman15 made them for me. They were a gift from Terry and I adore them. Occasionally when I clean my room, I’ll take them out of the closet and swing them, knock the dust off, and put them back in the closet.

I have several jars of home made custom wax. They are beautiful pastels, and they smell clean and crisp. My friend Kinky_Bookworm bought them for my birthday. Occasionally when I clean my room, I’ll dust the jars before I put them carefully next to the instructions in my closet.

I have the most amazing beautiful soft baby pink rope. My friend Nicegirl bought it for me, just because. I’ve never undone it because I’m afraid to tangle it. It smells like heaven, though. Occasionally I will wrap my fingers in the rope and meditate.

I’ve had all of these for at least a year, possibly 3. They have never been used.

Never. I think it’s because I don’t play at my house, and I never bring my toys with me to parties. I have thought to myself oh poor pitiful me, before. No one would want to play with me. But then the last few days, thinking over my toys, I had a gut check moment where I just stopped blaming everything on someone else.

What was I thinking? These are my toys. I should be using them. So I’m going to purchase a toy bag and bring my toys with me to parties.

I’m a little nervous about it, but mostly excited.


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