…. None of it matters.
I love him. He loves me. I don’t think that will change anytime soon.
But love isn’t the issue. It never has been. I can honestly say that we love each other very much. I’ve never been treated so well. He spent all his time taking care of me. He has foregone food, sleep, time, and money to ensure that his kitten was taken care of.
But I’m not capable of a healthy positive relationship that thrives on trust and compromise. I don’t trust anyone with my heart and so I couldn’t give it fully. I can’t compromise for the well being of the relationship.
We mutually decided, after weeks of anger and distance that this doesn’t work.
We want different things. And I can’t get out of my own way.
It hurts. But I think he will be better off.