The weight of meat and bones 

​I have been to the gym a few times a week for the last few weeks. I hate it. I hate everything about it. From the time it takes to the sore pinky toes and how I’m starving all the damn time. I hate it. What I hate the most is that I’ve actually gained weight. Before you say… No it isn’t muscle. (As a side note, muscle does not weigh less than fat. A pound of muscle and a pound of fat is still a pound. The mass is different, not the weight. …It’s a pet peeve) I don’t want to go, I don’t want to go, I don’t want to go. But… I’m so heavy. I got cleared to exercise and get healthy from all doctors. Great. I’m just facing an uphill battle. I can’t believe how much I weigh, AND I FUCKING GAINED WEIGHT!! 
I have flaws. Massive flaws. These do not lend well to the gym life. 

1. I’m lazy

2. I’m unorganized

3. I’m clueless. 

4. Chocolate

5. Coffee

6. If I’m going to be covered in sweat, I’d like it to include an orgasm. 

7. I don’t really have gym clothes.

8. Stupid sport bras. 

9. Beyonce. 

10. I’m lazy. 
It’s like I can do one thing. Laundry. Or house. Or bills. Or cooking… But not all of it. Already. And adding the gym feels like this is the one thing. So my house is horrible. And I haven’t gone grocery shopping. I don’t know how to carve out this time without it being a *Big Thing. I know I have to figure it out because Lord I’m heavy. 
Fuck sake. 


2 thoughts on “The weight of meat and bones 

  1. In the beginning, working out is always super hard. You are sore. You feel uncoordinated. It hurts. You want pizza & tacos. Just keep showing up. Eventually it becomes part of your everyday routine. You kick ass!!


  2. I feel you. I’m the same way about working out. Now that we’ve gotten somewhat settled, I want to start doing yoga/Pilates, but I have those exact same problems.


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